Have you ever had an imaginary argument in your head with someone?
The answer is almost certainly yes. And I bet like me it was never planned you just found yourself unaware how it started it just happened.
One minute your fine and the next your having a full on imaginary argument with someone without being aware of how it even began.
It could be with you partner one of your kids a neighbour or just about anyone you chose.
So where did that argument come from?
That argument just popped into your head, but why? Well as with all of your human experiences you must have had a thought to spark it off.
Back in the days when I was unaware of the realisation that my life was being controlled by my thinking I frequently found myself wrapped up in an internal imaginary argument often with my wife, but it could have been a driver if I was in my car, it could have been about a work colleague it could be about literally anything.
I sometimes even found myself talking out loud to myself even shouting if I was in the security of my car.
The outcome of these arguments would leave me feeling physically stressed and revved up almost as if I was looking for a fight.
I know now that my own relationship suffered, because I would frequently have these imaginary arguments with my wife and then arrive home agitated and spoiling for a real argument, which sadly frequently occured.
How many of you realise that when your having these made up imaginary rows that are having a diverse effect on your own physiology. In other words your body is reacting as if it’s real.
Once this happens you are ready for action, your cells are primed to fight your thoughts are primed to fight and there’s only one outcome to having that kind of physical and biochemical reaction going on.
So what’s different for me now?
Over the past 5 years or so I’ve come to the understanding that my thoughts are what is controlling my life. I’ve learned how to recognise my thoughts for what they are, just thoughts nothing else. Thoughts are not real , my arguments are not real and I’ve learned that once I catch myself having one of these imaginary arguments I have the power to step in and change it.
We think on average 70,000 thoughts a day , most we are unaware and happen subconsciously. By practicing mindfulness and meditation I’ve discovered you can calm your mind, you can recognise your thinking and you can chose to follow your thoughts into battle or sit quietly and wait for the inner self often referred to as wisdom to conjour up a new thought.
The arguments have stopped for Mr and as a result I have much better relationships with those people who used to imagine arguing with.
Think on this, the next time you find yourself involved in an imaginary argument, is it real what can I do to change it.
And if you do that the imaginary argument won’t become a real fight.
Take care enjoy the rest of Christmas